Blinded by the Light

Originally written on September 2, 2009. 

it's my turn now 
i step onto the vast stage
supposed to give a speech
it seems i have a way
to walk to the podium
my shoes echo
on the stage
the glare of the light
is blinding
can't see anyone
so nervous
not sure what
to say
how to say it
why am i even here
how did i get here
i have no speech
nothing prepared
i tap tap tap
into the mike
echos through the hall
no sound can be heard
except from me
i shade me eyes
but the light is so bright
i can't see ahead of me
no one else around
to help
i clear my throat
ahem ahem
echos through the hall
there's a glass of water
i drink from it
i have something to say
feelings thoughts
desires wantings
will it be heard
by whom
will they care
does it even matter
ahem ahem again
so nervous
heart is struggling
to keep the rhythm
to keep me up
not to faint
splat onto the stage
in front of who
the light is so bright
cannot see
it's blinding me
i hear a voice
off in the distance
can't tell from where
"c'mon ... say something"
i shield my eyes to see
nothing
"why am i here"
no response
silence
"sayyy something"
"turn down the light"
"i want to see"
"it's your own light"
"WHAT!"
i pause
gripped with confusion
don't understand
i look down
feeling moments
as if hours
then it comes
think i understand
think i can now see
the stage is me
blinded with my own light
no one can hear
no one is here
so i start my speech
i do have something
to say
something i must say
tap tap tap
into the mike
echoing into myself
or to whoever
chooses to hear
"hello, my name is Dragan"
"and i ..."
the light became brighter
blinding me
even more
now i can see ...