Anyway

As I was making coffee this morning, I noticed something that I've had stuck to my refrigerator. I actually see it all the time. I think about it often as well, so it isn't anything new for me. It's a piece of paper I have sleeved into this magnetic thing and has been with me since about 2003. It's called the Paradoxical Commandments, originally written by Kent Keith in 1968 and part of his great book titled "ANYWAY."

I came across the book during one of those difficult times in my life. It was a great struggle that I was going through, struggling with my still fresh divorce and the collapse of my career and my own company. I'll never forget the moment in how this came to me. I was in an office lobby, waiting to meet some "head hunter" for his review of me, a let's see what you have meeting. The meeting yielded disappointment as his focus was to convince me of some scheme to help "him" make money. 

Afterward, I'm sitting in the lobby, writing some notes and collecting my thoughts, when an older man sitting across from me said hello. I looked up, returned the hello and went back to my notes. Without so much as a further introduction, he chimes in "I have a book I would like to recommend for you to read." I look up to respond and realize he is now sitting next to me. His expression was very genuine and warm. I take him to be about 70 years old, but not the least bit frail. He was reasonably dressed, strong in appearance and expression. 

We shook hands, looking in each other’s eyes, his still a very brilliant grayish color behind his glasses, and he continues, "Do you like to read?" My quick response was "Love to!" My struggles must have been etched in my face. We like to feel that we are in control of how we appear to the outside world. Maybe in how we feel, but not in how it sees us. At least not that day for me. He adds "There's a book out there that might help you." Again my face had to give me away. Before I could respond he adds, "No, I'm not talking about the Bible, though that's a pretty good book. I'm talking about a book called Anyway, by Kent Keith. It's a short and quick read and you look like you could use what it has to say." 

I thanked him. Eventually we both looked at our watches and got up at the same time, heading for the door which he opened for me. The sun was washing down brightly on us. I looked to him and said, "Thank you very much." We shook hands again and went our separate ways. I'll never forget his face, but his name eludes me. He went his way and I went straight to a Border's Books store to find the book. I did. Read it right then and there. It was indeed a short book, totaling about 120 pages. Inside, was this mini poster with the Paradoxical Commandments on it. It's been on my fridge ever since. 

There will always be difficulties in life that we must face up to. Be it the end of a marriage, the loss of a job, the death of a dear friend, challenges with your child or loss of love. Stuff happens and will continue to just happen. Through it all you have to be true to who you are and go on with your life anyway. It's not easy some days. Then, I see this and remember ...

THE PARADOXICAL COMMANDMENTS

People are illogical, unreasonable, and self-centered.

Love them anyway.

If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives.

Do good anyway.

If you are successful, you will win false friends and true enemies.

Do good anyway.

The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow.

Do good anyway.

Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable.

Be honest and frank anyway.

The biggest men and women with the biggest ideas can be shot down by the smallest men and women with the smallest minds.

Think big anyway.

People favor underdogs, but follow only top dogs.

Fight for a few underdogs anyway.

What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight.

Build anyway.

People really need help, but may attack you if you do help them.

Help people anyway.

Give the world the best you have and you'll get kicked in the teeth.

Give the world the best you have anyway.

Whatever has happened to me, whatever will happen to me ... I make sure the world sees me for who I am ... anyway.