I think I'll walk instead ...

 Originally written on June 22, 2011.

I heard the whistle blow

Over the thrum of voices

Low and rising to a pitch

Woooo wooooooooo

Moving with the Doppler

I had to board this one

Missed too many already

All that I had wasn’t enough

A penny short

I fought off the tears

That knowing

He didn’t care anyway

No deals in life

Even a discounted fare

Must be paid in full

Then I saw it

Wavering as it rolled into view

No one sees it but me

Then it means everything to me

It stopped between my feet

Silently wobbling flat

My eyes must have been big

Big as dollars

For this penny

“Wait sir, I have enough now.”

Just enough

He rolled his eyes

As he counted

And counted

All that I had

To get where I want

Nothing here any more

Lost it all

Riches

Things

Most precious of all

Love

Need to get on that train

Far away from here

May not be better there

But it’ll be there

We’re all elbow to elbow

Waiting for the approaching cars

Billowing steam announcing their arrival

Maybe I can be by a window

Open it up

Let the fresh air in

Watch as we pass

The world by

To tomorrow

A final hiss

The rush was on

To get on

The pushing turned me around

My desire to leave this way

Faded with the steam

I see it differently now

The gloom was gone

It looked

Renewed

Refreshed

Where am I going why

I may run

But there is no hiding

Waited forever for that penny

Now’s my chance

Sometimes you don’t know

What you have

Until you’re losing it

Or about to leave it

This makes no sense

Nothing makes sense any more

Looked down at my ticket

Turned to look at the train

There are no refunds

Life comes at you

Nothing personal

Live it or leave it

I don’t want it all

Not any more

I just want life

Back

I want the fresh air

And not through a window

I’ll accept what I get

Just not fast on a train

To no where

But slow to where I’m going

Turning away

On the now empty platform

One step at a time

I look up

Hand the ticket back

“Thank you sir.”

He takes it

Never looking at me

He didn’t care

I’m just another

Of the others

“I think I’ll walk instead ...

… some things are still here.”