Daze without a name ...

I was lost

Who am I kidding
I am lost
There is no confusing it
No idea of where
I am
What day it is
Hard to tell
Any more
They are all the same
Running into each other
In a steady stream of days
No Monday cursing
No TGIF’s
No idea of the when

Doesn’t really matter

Been too many daze
This one
Into that one
And again and again
And again
What day is this
Actually I do know
But I don't want to know
I just want to scream
At the top of my lungs
But nothing comes out
Barely just a whisper
Like trying to blow out a hundred candles
Only to wheeze
With barely enough breath
To make even one flicker
Need to take a step
That crucial first step
Push my foot forward
Into another day of daze
That runs into another
Head on collisions with time
Going through the motions
No airbag of protection

No seat belt to hold me back
As the emotions escape

Crashing through the windshield
Shutting me down
From the awareness of this day
Or is it yesterday
Or the tomorrow I don't want
Again
Step by step by step
How does the path form
Into this path
With an uneasy cadence
Devoid of the desire
No more passion
I was there when it happened
When he died

I just stood there

And watched
Powerless to help
Just gave up

As that last straw took its toll
Then I left

Taking the carnage with me
Going from here to there
To this day or that day
No difference
Meaningless
Insignificant
On autopilot
Brief excursions to sanity
Only to return to when
It's another day
Without a name
One more time
One more time
One more time
Then tomorrow isn't here
Tomorrow never is
The gift of new is wrapped up
In the sunrise

Shooting forward
With the crack of dawn
As its bow
Maybe that day will
Get a name